Swans a’Swimming: Hacked

I’m doing my own version of the 12 Days of Christmas this year. Today, on the day lyrically celebrated by seven Swans a’Swimming, I’m republishing the 7th most popular post on StealingFaith in 2012.

 

Hacked lately?

 

I wonder because over the last four days I have gotten three messages from friends that, well, weren’t from my friends.

 

Similar to my experience of being hacked and sending an invitation to use Viagra to all my friends, family, and remote acquaintances, this week I have been invited to watch myself in videos, find out who’s viewing my profile, and win an iPad 3.

 

Just in case you, too, have received these special messages as a result of a hack, I thought we could compare notes on some clear indicators the message might not be from a friend.

 

HAHAHA i cannot believe whaat u did in thissss videeo its sooo sad its all over face book!!! gooo heree removee thee spacess —–> www .vidolaughs. com

1. I’m a writer. I used to teach writing classes. No one I know would willingly choose to send me a note leaving proper nouns lowercase or abbreviating “you” with “u” because they know these things give me hot flashes and start searching for a drink of rubbing alcohol.

 

2. The exceptional use of “ee”‘s in this message is confusing. I’ve discovered from teaching my kids to read that the “ee” part of English can be called the “squealy ee’s” but there’s nothing there to squeal about, just a questionable desire to switch to Olde English. Thou art welcomed.

 

3. If I were actually in a video posted all over facebook the link to the film would use the correct spelling. I’m not sure what a “vido” is but it might be related to a song by Ricky Martin, “Living la Vida Loco.” Just a guess, as Ricky Martin “vidos” are also questionable.

 

On to the next message:

 

hahahahahahahaha !!!!! thee delivery guy just droppeed off a box with thee neeew ipaadd-3 in it, after i reegistered on thaat fb pagee u told mee about!! I can not believee it workeed, gooo hereeee reeemoveee the spacesss —>>> www .fbgiftevent. com

 

4. Once again we’ve gone King James Version with the “thee” and excessive use of squealy “ee.” I’m not buying it unless your name is Irma and you wear a rainbow striped seer sucker shirt. And if your name is Irma and you wear seer sucker, there’s not a cricket’s chance with a chicken you don’t know how to spell “go here” correctly.

 

5. I know I have never invited anyone to “reegister” on a “pagee.” Perhaps if I were a wee bee looking for sights to see I might encourage others to try to win an “ipaadd” but as it is, I’m going to assume anyone who can’t correctly spell “iPad” is unlikely to be competent enough to operate it. That may be harsh but, really, it’s only four letters, folks.

 

Finally,

 

I just saw my top 10 PRIFOLE VIEWRS and I am SHOCKED from who is VEIWNG my profile! U can also See WHO Viewd YOUR PROFILE FROM BELOW.

 

6. I did a search of The Google to discover what a “prifole” was – the closest answer I got was related to Harry Potter and Privet Drive.

 

7. I made a decision awhile ago not to become shocked at who is – and isn’t – viewing my profiles. It’s easier to live that way. I just assume no actually knows me in real life and that makes it easier to admit to embarrassing events. So, no, I’m not going to be shocked. I don’t want to click the link. Go worry yourself over the online popularity profile views, I’ll be over here sticking french fries up my nose and reading the phone book for fun.

 

Have you gotten these messages recently?