“Me Likee” Link Up – Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and Other Stuff June 2013

June 2013

I haven’t been cruising the world wide web like I used to before a violent disease called exhaustion invaded my life. However, that just means the links I love are that much more lovable because they’re rare!

Here they are, links to things for Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, and all sorts of other good stuff, including a few places to go buys stuff if you’re so inclined.

1. Top 16 Worship Music Typos. Jon Acuff nails humor right on the head so very many times, and this post that shares reader submissions of the worst typos they’ve seen at church, well, it had me laughing out loud on more than one occasion.

2. How to Raise a Child Who Isn’t Whiney or Annoying. This post made me think about the First World Problems of my every day life. Good stuff.

3. One Thing Your Daughter Doesn’t Need You To Say. As a perfectionist who is the child of a perfectionist, giving myself grace has been a task I don’t manage well. I appreciated the tack this post took as I think about my parenting style. In counterpoint to that post, read 12 Things Your Daughter Needs You To Say. I bet my son will appreciate hearing them, too!

4. Abercrombie & Fitch CEO Explains Why He Hates Fat Chicks. I wasn’t a fan of this company anyway, mostly because I think it’s terribly wrong to market adolescents as soft porn and call it selling a t-shirt, but this article made me even more disgusted with the company and its founding values.

5. I Love Moms or Something. Pretty sure this is going to go down as my very favorite song ever. It’s great – just watch. You’ll see!

6. The Important Thing About Yelling. This post caught me square between the eyes. I’ve heard it said yelling is the new spanking. That may or may not be true, but most every parent I know raises their voice more than they prefer – and this post is a beautiful take on an ugly subject.

7. 10 Famous Women on “Having It All.” Quite simply, this is quotes from women who may seem to “have it all” on “having it all.” I thought the age difference of those quoted was interesting as well; I think generations have something to do with their perspective.

8. 6 Words You Should Say Today. I’ve been practicing these six words with our kids – and I like the results a lot!

9. Awkward Fathers. The photos on Awkward Family Photos never disappoint – bu this Father’s Day tribute made me laugh and laugh and laugh!

10. A Father’s Letter of Apology to His Boys (For Father’s Day). I really, really appreciate Dr. Kelly Flanigan’s perspective on relationships and this post about what fatherhood means to him was just inspiring.

I have two links as a bonus to the “Me Likee” Link Up. Both are opportunities for you to take your hard-earned cash and direct it toward something local and reasonable.

1. Reconnect with Agriculture. I follow several blogs about urban homesteading and one, The Tiny Homesteaders, has caught my attention thoroughly. They recently had a rabbit sickness sweep their herd and they lost all of their rabbits to it, through no fault of their own. Anyone buying one of their bumper stickers will be helping them rebuild their rabbit herd. And that’s a cool thing.

2. Colorado Mama Naturals. Erin with Colorado Mama Naturals was kind enough to send me some sample products from her store – and they were great! I know her personally and believe in the products she’s selling and find her values of family, healthy living, and putting first things first align pretty thoroughly with my own. You might like what she has to offer – go check her out!

What links would you like to share this month in the “Me Likee” Link Up?

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Copyright © StealingFaith.com 2010-2013 | All rights reserved

Would You Rather…? 50+ Questions to Engage Your Kids

Mexican Jumping Beans

Last night we went to dinner to celebrate Father’s Day. In a restaurant. Yes, folks, we actually went into public with all of our children.

Since dinnertime at home typically resembles a case of Mexican Jumping Beans, I knew the smart move would be to prepare for the event. It took awhile, but I finally figured out what to do beside the traditional coloring pages: Would you rather.

Yes, the game that, as college students, involved asking inappropriate, sometimes risqué questions where there’s really no good option but a choice must be made.

I tamed it down a bit for the youngsters and broke the questions out right after we ordered. It captured the attention of the 5-year-old and 7-year-old for the rest of the night, with the 3-year-old chiming in when she felt particularly inspired.

I’ve created a .pdf with more than 50 Would You Rather…? questions and you can get it right here: Would You Rather…? 50+ Questions to Engage Your Kids. To whet your interest, Would You Rather…

Be forced to hop everywhere like a bunny or crawl like a slug?
Play Hungry, Hungry Hippos or tag as the only game for the rest of your life?
Put your hands in vomit or poop?
Be blind or deaf?
Be a giant hamster or tiny rhino?

Grab the whole list by clicking here and hitting print!

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If you like this post, feel free to share it (with attribution).
Copyright © StealingFaith.com 2010-2013 | All rights reserved

A Father’s Day Ode

Medal of Honor

In honor of Father’s Day, I have composed a silly Ode. Let this not be confused with a Father’s Day Odor, which can be addressed with a shower and fresh application of deodorant.

Let us begin:

Blessed is the man who wallows in the bounty of children, for such a man need never fear old age.

His children shall rise up and provide for his creature comforts, encompassing toilet paper when he is stranded and hugs if he is burdened.

Honored is the man who shrinketh not from the foulest of parenting tasks, for lo, tho the diarrhea diapers shall come in an unceasing torrent, so shall the appreciation from his wife.

The man who changeth the diapers shall find his children remember he hath loved on them at their ugliest and thus shall be a stalwart companion in all circumstances.

Envied is the man who putteth his muscles to household chores, for thy garbage repeatedly accumulates and thy dishes don’t dirty themselves.

Yet a man who applyeth himself to these tasks shall be heralded amongst Bunco groups unnumbered and appreciated in all domestic dominions.

Glorious is the man who maintaineth his thirst for adventure and includes his progeny in such endeavors; indeed, the fondest memories are often of those experiences that resemble Murphy’s Law more than Pinterest.

Reminiscing of those devilish times shall be the cement of family unity and provide a basis for camaraderie for decades.

Powerful is the man who gentles his might to cradle a babe; who exposes vulnerability to his wife.

He shall be an example of greatness to his colleagues.

Desired fully is the man who labors at a job that respecteth not, payeth little, and frustrates much in order to provide for the care of his family. He shall receive opportunity aplenty to grow in character and perseverance.

Respected is the man who turnest his attention to his household, for he shall be adored and emulated by generations untold, he shall be honored with monikers, peace, and fame amongst his family.

Wisdom is the name of the man who loves as a fierce warrior; protecting those who need protection, sheltering this progeny under his leadership. His discernment shall be limitless.

All of this to say, thanks, dads, for being stand up guys who stick around, make us laugh, help out, and lead. We appreciate you!

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Copyright © StealingFaith.com 2010-2013 | All rights reserved

Sneaky, Sneaky

Fry2k / stock.xchng

Let’s take a moment to talk about a little promoted parenting skill – hiding things from your children.

Back in the early parenting days, where things were rosy and I didn’t want to plug my ears to avoid waking up in the middle of the night when the baby cried, I promised myself I would be the kind of parent who always told their child the truth. I would answer the hard questions with honesty and no topic would be off limits.

This was before I learned the depth of despair that can come over you when your child says:

“What’s in your mouth, Mommy?”

Oh! How I long for the opportunity to finish a bag of potato chips without sharing! Or keep my own pack of chewing gum and not be put to the test with suspicious questions from the peanut gallery of children I’ve produced.

Lizard and I have become gifted at hiding our food choices, particularly in the car. We smuggle pieces of Twix to one another like we’re performing some covert drug deal, hoping no one squeals and we don’t get caught with the contraband.

They catch us, though. They see our mouths moving, masticating food, and then come the chirps from the back seats: “What’s that?” “Can I have some of that?” “What’s in your mouth?” “I want some!”

They don’t even know what we’re eating, but they assume it’s good. And usually… they’re right. It’s the good stuff that adds pounds to our middles and gives us delirious sugar shock. It’s the stuff they only get as a treat or if they finish all their food and it’s a dessert night.

They know.

And we continue to hone our stealthy skills, hoping that one day, one blissful day in the future, we’ll be able to eat our treats without coming under attack…

Do you have to sneak food from your kids?

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If you like this post, feel free to share it (with attribution).
Copyright © StealingFaith.com 2010-2013 | All rights reserved

Card Carrying Member

Etsy / Vintage Library Cards

We’ve crossed a threshold of child rearing today – Uno and Dos got their very own library cards.

Today kicked off the summer reading program in our town and, instead of participating in the Harkin’s Summer Fun program, we decided to head toward the library and commit to do our best to get in about an hour of reading each day.

I have some concerns about this plan, but I’m going to go with it.

I’m a recovering bookworm. I’d still be deep in the throes of book love if I didn’t have children, but somehow the kids have derailed my plans to read and read and read. Meh. It’s a season of life – and the books are waiting for me, calling my name, on the other end!

What I will say is that, despite my love of the written word, I CANNOT STAND the scent of pages of old books. I think this has to do with the fact I have a bloodhound mixed up somewhere in my ancestry, but the smell of old pages on my fingers makes me nauseous.

What I do LOVE is my memories of time in the library as a kid, of reading every single book in the Wizard of Oz series, of the little envelopes and the stamps for due dates. I have great memories of the library as a kid, and still have my first library card tucked away with other important items like my birth certificate and marriage license.

We’ve always talked to our kids about the importance of reading, the freedom of a good story, of how you can travel anywhere or do anything when you can imagine a story in your head. Of course, for many years the most significant use they had for a book was as a teething toy.

It’s gross and disrespectful to the authors, but… it’s life.

Now that they’re a little older and working on improving their reading skills, however, the books are beckoning them. Today Uno picked out a book on drawing horses and a chapter book while Dos chose a book on rabbit care and a story about a bunny. They’re predictable, those kiddos.

I downloaded their first Nancy Drew, Harriet the Spy, and Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle on Audible.com. We’ll be listening to books after dinner, I think. And during rest time.

Since it’s been years and years since I was wandering the youth stacks at the library myself, I’d curious if any of you have suggestions for some great books for the girls? Either read-aloud or simple chapter books would be appropriate for us right now.

What are your favorites children’s books? Can you remember your first library card?

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Copyright © StealingFaith.com 2010-2013 | All rights reserved

Backyard Campout

porah / stock.xchng

I’ve just finished putting the kids to bed and Dos is crying because she’s not allowed to sleep outside tonight.

The side effects of a successful backyard campout.

You see, several weeks ago I had a bit of a hissy fit and decided we needed to make family time a priority this summer. Time spent away from our computers and phones, really paying attention to the kids and being present in the moment.

Distraction Free.

That’s seemed to be an impossibility for us many times. We are always available to friends via an electronic device. And I don’t think this is healthiest for our family. (I’ve been highly influenced by this post on Hands Free Parenting.)

During this hissy fit I laid down the law: we would go camping at least twice a month and have a family game night (not movie night!) at least once a week. We put it on the calendar and we’ve had a few rousing games of charades, Old Maid, and dominos. I’m hoping we can get gin rummy and spades down before too long!

This weekend was our first scheduled camping weekend and for one reason after another it just wasn’t going to be possible to actually leave and head to a camp ground. Our next best bet? Just setting up the tent in the backyard!

It’s not glamorous and it’s definitely dirty, but we put the tent in the trampoline, pulled the fire pit next to the swing set and settled down. All electronics had to be left inside (the exception was my phone and I was only allowed to take photos) and we did our best to spend quality time together.

Our simple campout dinner was roasted corn and hot dogs.

Dinner was pure finger foods; hotdogs and corn on the cob roasted over the fire pit with grapes. Dessert was an ice cream cone s’mores: peanut butter, chocolate, banana, marshmallow and caramel melted into a big glob in a sugar cone.

Ice cream cone s’mores: peanut butter, marshmallows, chocolate, banana, and caramel wrapped in tin foil to heat in the coals.

We sang A Boom Chicka Boom, Sippin’ Cider Through a Straw, Jesus Loves Me, and Kum Ba Yah. The girls got a chance to burn sparklers, then we told spooky stories around the fire pit, with everyone taking a turn and Tres coming up with the best story about a coyote eating us all up!

Dos loved her sparkler!

The Pinterest fail was trying to make a lantern using the goo inside a glow stick and a jar, but the next time we do it I think I’m going to plan ahead to make the glow stick hopscotch board. We also didn’t get a chance to play Ghost in the Graveyard so we’ll have to slate that for some time in the future.

It was full dark when we all crept inside the tent, a mass of dirty, smelly bodies cuddled together. The night started sweaty and ended freezing! We were all spooning by dawn just trying to stay warm!

Lizard got up early and made a warming fire while the kids consumed the apple strudel I picked up from the store for breakfast. We played around a bit more, came inside, took showers, and went about our day.

It was so simple! And it cost us nothing except a little pre-planning, which is another plan I really, really like!

Maybe this is your summer to go backyard camping? I’d love to hear about it in the comments!

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If you like this post, feel free to share it (with attribution).
Copyright © StealingFaith.com 2010-2013 | All rights reserved

Don’t Live With It

shed / stock.xchng

I have a bruise on my thigh that’s about two inches long and one inch wide. It’s purple and blue and green and yellow all over. Quite impressive, actually.

I don’t pay a whole lot of attention to it anymore because it’s been present on my thigh almost constantly for six years.

Why?

That bruise is from running into the foot board of our bed. I drive my leg into the corner of the bed at least once a week. Sometimes more frequently – my current bruise is worse than usual because I hit the bed twice in one day, two days in a row – but often enough that a sore spot on my thigh is my normal.

I have run into that bed countless times – it has little to do with the room, as we’ve had the bed in three different homes since we bought it. I just keep hitting it, getting mad, and finally deciding to just live with the bruising and accept that I’ll have a black and blue circle for as long as we have the bed.

This is really dumb when you think about it. Why accept the wound from an inanimate object? I don’t know. But it seems easier.

The more I think about it, the more ridiculous that bruise gets. It doesn’t make sense to keep doing the same thing over and over and not learn something about how to change it for the better!

And think about this from a larger perspective. Are there things in your own life that are really dumb, hurt you, and could be circumvented but you’ve decided to just live with it? I bet there are!

I keep uncovering this lazy, “no change” thinking in my life. A perfect example involves church. We’re involved in a church plant that’s meeting in a high school each week. My husband goes early on Sundays to help set up and stays late to break everything down. The first year we attended I didn’t help with the set up or break down. The second year I haven’t helped because I’m holding a baby and chasing kids.

The way my kids run wild before and after church has been driving me crazy for two years. It’s not that they (or any of the kids) are being particularly bad… it’s just highly UN-structured time in a building with lots of crooks and crannies that I’d prefer them to stay out of.

Over time this has become a problem that has made me not even want to go to church. I hate that I feel like I’m always yelling at them, that trying to keep all four kids in check is a Herculean task that I can’t complete.

Then, about three weeks ago, it hit me – why are we doing this at all? Why not flip the switch and do something else completely?

I talked with Lizard and we decided to drive to church separately Instead of waiting before and after for him to complete his work I gather the kids and we go grocery shopping. They enjoy the outing and I enjoy not having to yell at them for running amuck. It’s flawless!

And it took me two years to figure out.

I’m on a kick not of looking at the things that are frustrations… but not really deal breakers, and trying to see if I can “flip the switch.” Sometimes a simple change can do an awful lot in the way of improving your mental attitude and increasing your ability to meet adversity with grace.

I’d love to hear your stories of little changes that make a huge difference!

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If you like this post, feel free to share it (with attribution).
Copyright © StealingFaith.com 2010-2013 | All rights reserved

Getting Messy

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Tonight my parents watched our kids at Chick-fil-A while I went out with my husband of nine years. I can say that because it’s our anniversary and I know we’ve been married for nine years because we told our server at Red Lobster right before she brought us our meal and I destroyed my crab legs, which are the most violent meal a person can eat.

It takes a certain kind of commitment to sign up to take four young kids out in public and I applaud my parents for doing it. They were suitably punished for their bravery by the kids. I’ve gone out with them frequently enough that I’m used to people doing a visible head count when we walk in the door.

But my parents, not so much. I believe about the time Tres spilled her orange juice all over the table and Dos slid to the floor in a sad fit because she had to wait to go to the play area they decided they wouldn’t be volunteering for babysitting duty again anytime soon. And that was before Bubby was kind enough to have a blow-out diaper while sitting in my mom’s lap chomping chicken nuggets.

That kid, he’s a giver. My mom? She was less than impressed with the chunks of excrement he produced and kindly shared with her clothing.

Believe it or not, she was still able to laugh about her experiences when we caught up with them after our own dinner. We all had a good laugh about how to expect the unexpected when it comes to child rearing.

Why is it that we’re willing to accept the world’s most disgusting activities (i.e., being used as a living latrine) when it comes from something that shares our genetic code?

Oh, no, no one is typically overjoyed to have a diaper full of unidentified mush and a solid 1/3 cup of corn, but it happens. And we may gag a little and squeal, but we put up with it… because we love the one making the smelly gift.

Since it’s our anniversary and everything, I started thinking about the ways we love one another through the ugly, through the poopy parts of life.

I’ve come to believe, despite my youthful fancies, that marriage isn’t about the beautiful wedding dress or Martha Stewart-esque ideas of a perfect home, perfect meals, and perfect children. All of that is a facade hiding the real stuff, the life that coats you with chaos when you’re least expecting it in the same way a poopy diaper can plan a sneak attack on your pants!

Marriage is about not quitting, about being willing to to the right – but rough – thing because it’s in the best interest of your family.

A speaker I heard last week said most of us are “undivorced” instead of really “married.” I think he was right and I think we can do better. Just occupying the same address is not a marriage; in my mind, walking literally and figuratively through each day hand in hand comes a lot closer to the better definition of marriage.

Most of us are able to keep time with someone else, but it’s a different story to actually live in communion with the significant other we chose. The day in, day out, nitty gritty of life takes hard work. It’s not fun and it sometimes carries a lot of ugly.

But it’s worth it, really, it is! I can say that my husband and I have gone through some nasty times… but we’re stronger for it. The storms have taught us how to stand firmly together, choosing to get messy with real life. If we can come up with this many stories in only nine years, I wonder what the next nine years will bring?

Can’t wait to find out…

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No Fault

The baby’s in the dog crate.

No, this isn’t some new form of space manipulation, it’s a sign of his dexterity.

He’s 10 months old. I’ve locked the door to the dog crate at least seven times today. He’s figured out how to lift, slide and pull the latch so that he can get in. And now, at the end of the day, I’m just watching him wallow around in the crate, becoming more and more covered in dog hair.

That’s how we roll, folks.

About two weeks ago we went in for his regular check up and discovered he’d crossed several of the major percentile lines in a weight plummet; the doctor recommended we get about six different blood tests done to see if we could identify what was going on. The tests ranged from a diagnosis that would be inconvenient to deadly.

The last few weeks have been a waiting game as we try at home to plump the boy up. Our brains realize he’s gotten three teeth in the last three weeks, and started crawling and pulling up. The kid’s burning calories like mad! In my gut I feel there’s nothing wrong with him… he laughs, his eyes are bright, his attitude is inquisitive. But… what if we’re wrong?

This is the battle we fight as parents, and maybe what I hate the most about the Information Age. Our gut instincts tell us something, but our ability to master search engines casts doubt on the certainty.

Want to potty train your kid? Here are 16 different methods. If you choose the wrong one you’ll have a kid pooping their pants at the high school pep rally after they’ve already earned their drivers license. It’s all your fault.

Want to sleep? Don’t take a chance at the cry it out method… and definitely don’t co-sleep… don’t you know that sleep patterns are linked to obesity and obesity is one of the greatest threats to health in the United States? It’ll be all your fault.

Want your children to excel academically? That’s awesome but don’t be surprised when they off themselves in response to the irrational pressure you place on them. Want to let them find themselves in freedom? Well, you’re the one who’s going to have to be visiting them behind a glass window in prison because you never set firm boundaries. It’ll be all your fault.

I’m sick of thinking everything’s my fault! Yet I fall into this pattern regularly. My husband has been a godsend, helping me realize things just happen sometimes, things that don’t require an assignment of fault.

Sheesh. All I can say is that right in the middle of my deep contemplation of fault and watching my son roll around to get a coating of dog hair a commercial for the new show Pretty Wicked Moms came on.

I think I’ve found something that will make my worst parenting moments look pretty benign. Thank you, Lord. With that I’m off to bed.

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RIGHT HERE

skizof / stock.xchng

I’m frozen in place because I was on the floor playing blocks with Bubby when he crawled over to my lap and fell asleep.

So this is why people recommend getting down on the floor with your kids to play at least once a day. I sure wouldn’t trade the experience of having this little boy asleep on my lap for anything else.

I don’t always act that way, though. I get distracted, I get busy, and I let my focus on things overcome my more intentional desire to be a hands on parent.

Last night I played Old Maid with the girls in the middle of our kitchen floor. That felt really good. It’s also the first time we’ve played Old Maid since our family vacation… last June, 11 months ago. I’ve let my fear of them bending the edges or losing the cards – a deck of cards I bought for 88¢ – keep me from investing 30 minutes of time in my children.

My parenting is a little like a string of beads – big dollops of memories strung together by skinny moments of just surviving. Consistency? Questionable.

Since I couldn’t move anyway, this afternoon I picked up Shepherding Your Child’s Heart by Tedd Tripp. It’s been on my to do reading list for at least three years, and it happened to be in arms reach from my spot on the floor.

I’ve only made it through the introduction and Chapter 1 so far, but I’ve gotten a nugget that has made me pause and ponder long enough for my bottom to go completely numb:

“The purpose for your authority in the lives of your children is not to hold them under your power, but to empower them to be self-controlled people living freely under the authority of God…

Parents who are “benevolent despots” do not usually find their children racing to leave home. Children rarely run from a home where their needs are met. Who would want to walk out on a relationship in which he feels loved and respected?”

It stopped me in my tracks because I agree with this sentiment – and I don’t think I’m parenting this way. Words like “empowered,” “self-controlled,” “loved,” and “respected” aren’t what come to mind when I replay the last week in our home – or even the last four hours!

Somehow the magical infatuation that flooded me when each of these children was born has worn way into an endless struggle of dirty clothes, messy bedrooms and wooden blocks placed at just the right location to permanently maim you as you walk through the living room.

Yes – parenting is about the basics, like food, clothing and shelter. But it’s also about the intrinsic and invisible. It’s about taking the time to hold a baby boy because he wants to be on your lap, about looking for the Old Maid or jumping on the trampoline with the full knowledge there’s a time coming when they won’t ask anymore if they’ve learned you always say, “No.”

Life has got to be about more than a constant struggle with a messy house. Or a job or unattainable dreams. It’s got to be about paying attention and finding joy and purpose RIGHT HERE.

Here’s for a re-commitment to loving, empowering, and respecting my children into a self-controlled adulthood… as best as I can.

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Stealing Faith

humor for relationships, family & life

Tag Archives: parenting

“Me Likee” Link Up – Mother’s Day, Father’s Day and Other Stuff June 2013

Would You Rather…? 50+ Questions to Engage Your Kids

A Father’s Day Ode

Sneaky, Sneaky

Card Carrying Member

Backyard Campout

Don’t Live With It

Getting Messy

No Fault

RIGHT HERE