Don’t be jealous, but…

Too bad we couldn't put our three in a pouch for the cross country travel!

Heeelllloooooo! Not as a deliberate attempt to make you jealous, but I’d like to mention I’m sitting on a screened-in porch listening to waves slap against the shore, cicada’s buzz, a racoon or two rummage around, and a shrimp boat maneuver through the channel.


It’s pretty much paradise.


And, because really, deep down inside my black heart, I do want you to be jealous, here’s the cherry on top: I took a two-hour nap today.


Bliss. Pure bliss.


Now, to bring the reality back into focus so you don’t get eaten up by the green-eyed monster, I haven’t seen my ankle bones for three days. Why, hello, cankles. Glad to see you again….


With 72 hours and a nap between now and the day of air travel, I my angst has waned.


(It’s the same principle as childbirth… you want to shoot yourself while you’re in the midst of it but after a little bit of time with the end result… you forget the level of purgatory you’ve just experienced. I have a very short memory. That’s why I’m pregnant with our fourth child.)


For our cross-country plane ride we had six adults and five children ages six and under traveling with us, which, in any rational person’s mind, is a recipe for disaster. I woke up with nightmares the night before the trip, worried about what would go wrong. (Thankfully my dreams didn’t involve snakes on the plane like this news story from Australia a while ago.)


We prepped the girls as much as possible about what was about to happen. It was repetitive, yet both Uno and Dos responded very well to us walking them through each step of the process, especially the security screening.


Each kiddo also had a backpack/roller bag loaded with special items, so they had their own responsibility and a vested interest in not leaving their bag anywhere. They did great!


My dad had a vested interest in keeping his CPAP machine safe. Neither of my parents fly often (since September 11 they’re convinced airports are havens for all the bad things in the world, including Montezuma’s Revenge and paper cuts) and this is the first trip they’ve since my dad was diagnosed with sleep apnea. Since he tends to become super-focused on specific items the protection of the CPAP machine became his sole reason for existence.


He did not let it out of his sight at all from the time he left the front door of his house. When they security asked him to run it through the screening machine it was a flyby on meltdown city because he was scared his CPAP would be ruined or he would lose it forever.


We made it, but it was a close call.


I was left with a lingering sense of relief and a deep wish the security people had confiscated the “everything” muffins my mom had stashed in a Ziploc baggie in her purse. She was worried we’d be hungry. So she carried muffins in her purse. Across the country.


We traveled during nap time and, believe it or not, all three of the kids hit the sack once we were in the air! Our luck was amazing!


Remember that activity travel bag I packed for the kids? It was really, really heavy. Wanna know how many items they used?


Zero. Nada. Zilch.


But at least I was prepared, right?!


My newfound confidence in traveling with children dissolved when we hit the rental car line to fulfill Uno’s fondest aspiration, to drive a minivan. Lizard realized the iPad was still in the back of the seat pocket!


We think the iPad is in Chicago.


We have hope we may see it again. Maybe. Hope springs eternal, right?


If you’ve made it this far through my description of our travel adventure, congratulations. It’s obvious there wasn’t an episode of House or Jersey Shore more engaging for you. I appreciate that. Very much.


Final thought about our travel before I move on to other topics tomorrow…. we stopped at Costco and bought $600 worth of food. (And a 36-roll pack of toilet paper.) Stow ‘n Go is pretty amazing. Which brings Uno one step closer to driving a minivan…


Someone stage an intervention! If Stella ever knows I have considered ditching her for a minivan she is going to be super, duper ticked. Who knows where she might drive herself?? She’s a sensitive soul.


Do you like to vacation places that involve air travel? What’s your craziest travel story?

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