Drool and Contractions

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I’ve decided to accept the fact I drool almost incessantly at night as a sign of exhaustion, rather than one of impending senility.


But I guess it’s hard definitively identify the root cause of these things. Easy to recognize a soggy pillow, hard to determine why.


Last night I got nine hours of sleep. You’ll notice I didn’t say “uninterrupted” sleep, just sleep. Because when you’re pregnant you have to get up to use the bathroom several times and I’ve discovered not only do your arms go tingle on occasion, the additional weight of this baby makes my hips go numb as well.


The greatest thing about this sleep? When I got up this morning I caught a glimpse of my ever-elusive ankle bones!


This is exceptionally exciting because after flying across the country on Sunday they disappeared completely and I thought I would not see them again until a few weeks postpartum. Add that to the pre-term/false labor I’ve been experiencing the past few days and all hope was gone.


But, no! Hope springs eternal! If I can spend a few more days off my feet, maybe the ankles will re-emerge and the contractions will disappear!


Let me tell you something, folks. “False Labor” is not so “false.” It may not produce exactly the kind of progress needed to spurt the baby out, but there is nothing fake about feeling your lower back explode into knife-like stabs while your insides repeatedly crumple up like someone smushing a piece of paper into one fist. It’s just plain mean.


Puts a whole new twist on the whole Adam and Eve, fall of mankind thing for me. (Of course, if pregnancy and labor were easy-breezy, I’d likely have 16 children. As it is, I’m think “four, no more” is a good catch phrase for the rest of my life.)


I apologize if you’re offended I didn’t post the last few days… if you’d like, you can blame my drool and senility.


I’m sticking with the exhaustion.

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