How to Annoy Your Spouse

Every once in awhile I get a wee bit of the devil in me, don’t we all?!

 

Admittedly, when the devil crops up in my life, my poor husband is usually the recipient. Tonight, inspired by this blog post, I want to share a few things that will likely inspire ire in your spouse.

 

1. Wake them up at dawn by singing the fight song of your college alma mater.

 

2. Eat chips in bed… on their side.

 

3. Leave cabinet doors open at eye level, begging for their head to be smashed.

 

4. Spend a lot of time on the toilet, the sacrosanct room of the house. But make sure you bring your smart phone to play Words with Friends or check status updates.

 

5. Place Saran Wrap over the toilet seat before going to bed at night.

 

6. Put yogurt in the mayonnaise jar but forget to mention the swap.

 

7. Sell possessions they brought into the marriage on Craig’s List.

 

8. Ask if you can talk during critical moments of television time.

 

9. Cry. Inexplicably. Just cry. Get it all out.

 

10. Order a different beverage than they order, then drink all of their beverage.

 

11. Leave the bathroom door cracked open while they shower.

 

12. Take the batteries out of the remote control. Ask them to fix it for you.

 

13. Put a rubber band around the handle on the kitchen sink spray nozzle. Point it towards the front of the sink and wait for them to turn on the water.

 

14. Reverse their contact lenses in the case.

 

15. Switch around the contacts on their phone. Exchange their best friend’s name for their parent’s.

 

16. Fill the mail box with ping pong balls or packing nuts. Ask them to get the mail for you.

 

17. Remove the plastic bags from cereal boxes and switch them around. Leave them wondering why Cheerios came out of a box of Lucky Charms.

 

18. Take some nail polish and coat a bar of soap with it. Let it dry. Then put it in the bathroom shower. When they try to use it, they will go nuts trying to get it to lather up.

 

19. Barely unscrew the lightbulb in their nightstand. Repeatedly.

 

20. Hide a large inflatable or scarecrow-type item behind the shower curtain.

 

For the record, I was born missing the “fun” gene. So, while I tend to think teasing my husband is great fun, I get mad when he turns these pranks around on me.

 

So I’ve learned not prank him. Because he always gets me back… worse. And then I get angry and that’s not awesome for marital harmony. So use your best judgement for your own relationship and don’t blame me for the consequences.

 

If all these pranks and annoying goodies are making you feel badly about how you treat your significant other, then take a gander over here to get some ideas of how to really love your mate.

 

In the meantime, what ideas do you have for annoying your spouse or playing an innocent prank on them?

 

This post was originally published September 28, 2012 and is being recycled as part of the “I’ve Been Around” summer! Hope you enjoyed it and I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!