Razzle Dazzle

I went on a date with Lizard tonight!

We had dinner and then hit the candy store for some treats at the movie.  My old standby, the raspberries and blackberries were loaded into the bag and I was paying when… wait!

What did I see?!

RAZZLES!

I always forget about the Razzle, a candy and a gum!  Such a strange, strange combination and it works rather well.  So I added it to the bag and took a package to the movie with me.

(We saw the Adjustment Bureau.  I think I liked it a good bit, but it was going for a greater, grand picture and I’m not sure it came through loud and clear.)

We came home and I had a little look-see at the stats for this blog and discovered something very interesting.

The site keeps track of any keywords or phrases that a search engine used to pull up this particular address.  And… well, I think you’ll see why I giggled when I saw them…

There were many flavors of the marriage variety.  “When will I get married?”, “How to get married”, and “How to get married in 6 months” were phrases that I’m certain were references to the post written about my mom and dad and how disastrous first dates can turn into wedded bliss.  My quickest answer is that if you’re asking this to the Google search engine you’re limiting your potential to meet new spouse-potential people.  GET OFF YOUR COMPUTER.

“Reading pregnancy tests” Well, I have been in the shoes of the person who Googled that little phrase, let me tell you, I have been in those shoes.  One would think pregnancy test manufacturers would realize that women trying to figure out if the course of their lives will be changed forever while also a bit grossed out about peeing on a stick for multiple seconds are not in the mood to play guessing games with pregnancy results!  One line, two lines?  Pink line? Blue?  It’s like a Dr. Suess book gone wrong.

“Is there caffeine in cheese?” Not yet, my cheeseheaded friend, but if I can I will change the world with super-charged cheese sticks!  They might not be the answer to world peace, but I’m pretty sure my caffeinated cheese sticks could contribute to balancing the national budget.

“Female Tennis Outfits” This is a surprise to me.  Did I write about tennis and not remember?? I was on the tennis team in junior high.  I showed great promise until I realized that tennis players should be limber and not firmly believe they have an allergy to sweat.  I didn’t get to wear a tennis outfit.

“Tooth fairy necklace” Ha!  I have an immediate vision of a necklace of lots of little fairies wearing crowns of teeth.  Yeah, that’s how my brain works.

I can’t wait to see what new items appear in the search results for the stats in the next week!  I can tell you that a google image search for “razzle” brings up many more explicit photos than a search for “razzles”.  I’d recommend careful typing in this situation, folks.

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