As I mentioned, yesterday was the day for birthday parties. Every party has a goody bag of candy.
The hours between the goody bag dispersal and this morning were one long series of, “Can I have the bubble gum? Can I have the Smarties? Can I have candy? Can I? Can I? Can I?!!!”
We aren’t anti-candy in our house but I usually monitor how much they have pretty strictly. Dessert for us is two Oreo cookies. Maybe one piece of gum in a day… Juice is a no go 85% of the time for us.
After fielding the candy requests for almost 24 hours and the resulting wails when I told them to wait and space it out, I finally gave up.
“Eat it all!” I hollered at the hoodlums. “Eat it all and then it will be gone and I won’t have to deal with your infernal pestering and complaining anymore!”
It was a risky move. I don’t know how it will end.
So far, I know six gobstoppers, 10 pieces of gum, four Smarties, a dozen Starburst and three lollipops have been consumed. And that’s just what I’ve seen.
They’ve been hiding in their bedroom, scarfing candy as quickly as possible, just in case I change my mind. Their carefully hoarded treasure of sugary goodness is almost depleted.
Uno has been off in the corner, murmuring happily to herself about ponies.
Dos has jumped off the bunk bed and started crowing like a rooster.
And Tres… Tres at one point ran through the house yelling, “Like This! Like This! Like This!”
Then she came out of her bedroom wearing Kleenex boxes as shoes. She had emptied the contents of the boxes like a path of Hansel and Gretel crumbs.
And a few moments ago I heard, “Mommy! Mommy! Need help! I stuck!” from our little two-year-old. When we rushed to her aid we found her curled up like a pretzel inside the washing machine wearing only a pair of Tinkerbell panties and a worried expression.
Dang front loader. Dang two-year-old. Dang candy.
I don’t know how this experiment will end. I just wanted to let you know how it’s going so far.
”It’s Over. Time to pee on the campfire and call in the dogs.”
Have you ever given your children unfettered access to candy? How did it turn out for you?